Re-adjustment

We have been back now for 2 months and I thought everyone was settling in well, girls had gone to school and seemed happy..

Then yesterday I see that Mia has not really made any friends at school, and is hanging out with her sister, which is nice, but they need to find their own friends.

They have come into a small school where friendships have been formed, luckily for Amelie she has made a lovely friend, who's friends had left the school last year, but Mia only has 3 other girls her age in the class and they don't seem to want to include her..

What do you do as a parent..? I want to invite the girls over to play to try an encourage friendship, but then I think I should just leave alone and things will sort themselves out. It is not like Mia is unhappy at school.

Amelie called me to her bed for a "chat" last night god love her she was so upset.. "Mummy I have something sad to tell you, Hannah is not from England" with this she broke down in tears.. I said "is she from Scotland?" Amelie "yes and she will leave"  She has only known living the life of an ex-pat and she believes people will leave if it is not their home country. She had no idea where Scotland was, so I had to assure her that Hannah was not going to leave.. I will be checking with her mum at pick-up.!

I had managed to get the girls into Beavers and we went to the 1st meeting last night, I had offered volunteer so I could stay, but they both ended up crying and not wanting to go into the room.

Then today we have had more tears from Amelie (Mmm maybe a bit of a drama queen) saying that the schools in England are too hard and she wants to go back to Vietnam and her old school. That her leg husts so she can't do PE.. what did I do, kiss her goodbye and packed them off with their Dad to do the drop off.

It is difficult to know what your children are feeling when you re-pratriate,  England is my home and I have settled back very qucikly, but they have never lived in England and it is all new. The only thing I can do is be there for them to make them feel secure and let them talk about their concerns, but all I really want to do is make it all better, I really wanted to keep Amelie off from school today as she was so up-set, but knew that is not the best course of action in the long run.

It's shit when you think your kids are un-happy, both Philippe and I feel crap today, but I know when I go and pick them up in a couple of hours they will probably come bouding out of school happy and telling me they had a great day.. Kids..!

 

September 16, 2011 1 tags (show)

Comments

HELEN

HELEN said:

I really feel for you and your girls, it’s so hard at school, especially in a small school and girls can be very harsh at times. If there are 3 other girls in Mia’s class then she does stand a chance, as 3 definitely is a crowd with some girls, maybe invite one of them over and hope that over time she gets let into the group.
It must be really hard but fingers crossed it will get better for them
x

TheBoyandMe

TheBoyandMe said:

It is going to take time but they will get there. In the first instance, if you haven’t spoken to their teacher, I would suggest tgat. If I heard that my two new pupils were having difficulty adjusting then I would do a little project on life in Vietnam. Maybe they could do a show and tell, create a scrap book with photos of their life in Vietnam which could be on display in the classroom. It might encourage others to chat & be friendly to them?

Nicki Cawood

Nicki Cawood said:

Never easy is it and there is no easy answer. I’m sure things will get easier, they’ve had a long break from school, 9 weeks wasn’t it? A move, a new country….. personally I think you are ALL doing blooming fantastic. Kids are pretty resilient deep down, I’m sure they’ll both get over the wobbles soon (so don’t feel crap!).

miatui

miatui said:

12 long weeks off school, this was the 1st full week of school, as much as I am enjoying it, I think they are a bit tired and over school..!! C x

miatui

miatui said:

Girls are the worst hey, they are either best friends or hate each other.. boys just play football. C x

miatui

miatui said:

See I wished you were their teacher..! They seemed happy coming out of class this afternoon. End of a long week. Time for wine..! How have you been? C x

Katheyn

Katheyn said:

Well reading that made me cry (just my 4week postbaby hormones yet again!) but I really feel for u. I know I have this all to come one day! Chloe lost another best buddy this summer as she moved to Thailand (she may be popping back as a surprise for Chloe’s 6th birthday in 2weeks which will make me cry again I’m sure!) and found out yesterday that Phoebes best friend is moving with her family to Singapore!
Heart breaking isn’t it! I guess in the long run this will make them all stronger and more outgoing?! Amelie and Mia have an amazing mummy (and Daddy) who have and always will be there for them and they will be just fine. Enjoy that glass of wine xxx

Rebecca

Rebecca said:

it doesn’t matter where you move, moving is TOUGH no matter where you go. I’d say even more diifixult when it’s back “home”. going into a situ where the (kids) group has been together for some time is esp difficult. HOPEFULLY someone will break the “ice”. Thinking of you!!!!

miatui

miatui said:

Don’t cry you silly thing..! how are you and Theo.. We had that name for a boy, but said the French way and spelt Teo. It is hard when their friends leave, how are the girls doing.?

Take care C x

Simone

Simone said:

Hope they settle down soon for you :) 12 weeks is a long time to be on holidays! Hope all else is going well? You? Philippe?

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